Monday, July 30, 2012

Help

I get a weekly newsletter from the President of the Indiana Associations of United Ways. It is a mix of helpful tips, things to think about and general silliness. In an organization that can tend toward taking itself too seriously, I appreciate this mix.

This gem was in today's newsletter:


One Piece of Advice
Who can resist the request, “Can you help me?”  Most of us get caught up in showing we are competent and able to do our job, but the United Way job is about getting other people engaged in the work.  United Way work is not about going early, staying late and doing as much as possible ourselves.  We must have the confidence to ask others to help, not because we can’t, but because asking is a strength.  Ask for a specific task that is obviously achievable.  Then start with, “Can you help us?” 

I wonder: Do we think of asking for help as a strength? 

When I work late, it's as often because I became paralyzed during my work day as it is being truly busy. The paralysis sets in when I am putting myself to new and possibly insurmountable tasks. So asking for help would be pitiful, akin to my children's whiny "I caaaannnnn'tttt DOOOOO it." 

But would it? And when I'm overwhelmed, whether it's because of fear paralysis or truly having too much to do, I never think that asking for help will be the solution. Working harder seems to always be the solution. 

So I need help: in transforming how I think about help. And in getting out of my paralysis. 

The thought that the solution is so easy as asking for help is great. However, how does one know whom to ask? 

The permission to ask, and the advice that asking is strength cause a paradigm shift that is one I would like to embrace. 

Do you think of asking for help as strength?